Snacks and Naps

Today as I study, I find that my mind is closed. Or maybe it is my ears. Possibly it could be my heart. As I read, prayed and meditated on today's scripture, I felt that I wasn't "hearing" anything from God, today. It happens. Often God is silent when I need to settle. Sometimes God has been silent when I need to get my "heart junk" out of the way; those broken places with in me that color the way I think against God's will. Sometimes, later on, through more prayer and discernment, I realize I wasn't listening. Often I don't listen because I don't like what I am hearing. I can't tell you what is going on today. What I can tell you is I WILL find out. 

Am I worried? No. God has a way of showing up, and showing out to me. I mean let's be honest, God got me to give in to the idea I was being called to ministry. Does this mean I am weak in my faith, my listening? Maybe. However, I question anyone that says they have a direct line to God and ALWAYS know what God is speaking into their lives. 

Even Mother Teresa had moments of "apartness".
“Jesus has a very special love for you. As for me, the silence and the emptiness is so great that I look and do not see, listen and do not hear,” she wrote the Rev. Michael van der Peet in September 1979.

I have found, for me, God is often silent because I need to listen harder. I need to listen in the quiet moments. So today, from afternoon on will be a quiet time for me; a restful time. A time to wait and hear.

I didn't read this today, but I am reminded of the Prophet Elijah, being chased by the prophets of Baal who wanted to kill him. He just wanted to lay down and die from exhaustion. He napped under a tree, ready to die when God sent him food, rest and then sent him to the mountain. Here read it. You will see, God isn't always loud and flashy.

1 Kings 19:3-12 "When Elijah saw how things were, he ran for dear life to Beersheba, far in the south of Judah. He left his young servant there and then went on into the desert another day’s journey. He came to a lone broom bush and collapsed in its shade, wanting in the worst way to be done with it all—to just die: “Enough of this, God! Take my life—I’m ready to join my ancestors in the grave!” Exhausted, he fell asleep under the lone broom bush. Suddenly an angel shook him awake and said, “Get up and eat!” He looked around and, to his surprise, right by his head were a loaf of bread baked on some coals and a jug of water. He ate the meal and went back to sleep. The angel of God came back, shook him awake again, and said, “Get up and eat some more—you’ve got a long journey ahead of you.” He got up, ate and drank his fill, and set out. Nourished by that meal, he walked forty days and nights, all the way to the mountain of God, to Horeb. When he got there, he crawled into a cave and went to sleep. Then the word of God came to him: “So Elijah, what are you doing here?” “I’ve been working my heart out for the God-of-the-Angel-Armies,” said Elijah. “The people of Israel have abandoned your covenant, destroyed the places of worship, and murdered your prophets. I’m the only one left, and now they’re trying to kill me.”  Then he was told, “Go, stand on the mountain at attention before God. God will pass by.” A hurricane wind ripped through the mountains and shattered the rocks before God, but God wasn’t to be found in the wind; after the wind an earthquake, but God wasn’t in the earthquake; and after the earthquake fire, but God wasn’t in the fire; and after the fire a gentle and quiet whisper."

Maybe that is what God wants for me too, a snack and a nap and then listen in the quiet. See you tomorrow. Stay well. Stay home.