Comfort Will Come in the Mourning

This morning when I woke up I really just wanted to stay in bed. I don’t suffer from depression, clinically but I still have those days when. something or someone has gotten me so down that I just want to lay in bed and look at tiktok or read a book or really listen to an audiobook and wallow in self-pity. I don’t really want to face the world. Days like today want try to take me down but I dragged myself out of bed and went and worked out which helps. dopamine and endorphins are always a good thing for feeling down. There was a time when a day like today would cause me to eat my feelings. Instead, I went to Sonic and got a Diet Dr. Pepper. Thanks to some education that I’m working through I don’t use junk food anymore to feel better, but I didn’t think a good fizzy cup of caffeine with no sugar would be a bad thing this morning maybe it would perk me up. 

As I sipped my soda, I began to work through my feelings, but by bit. As I unraveled what seemed to be like a knitted bunch of  strings, I came to a realization. I’m in mourning today.  Todays blog won’t include funny stories about a puppy cat or humorous antidotes about bulldog girls or cute pictures of my grandkids and funny stories because today I’m sad. My sadness is born out of disappointment for being let down by someone I have would give the shirt off my back to. I’m in morning because I want the best for this person and I am heart broken because they are hurting themselves. And my heart is breaking because I can’t help.

As I study, I move even further today into Matthew,  The Beatitudes, the second one. I find it beautiful that God always takes me where I need to go. Today’s beatitude is, “Blessed are those who mourn for they will be comforted.” **If you haven’t read about the first beatitude I encourage you to look at last yesterdays blog and soak in all the beatitude information you can.”

Mourning is when you feel heartbreak for someone else, maybe they’ve died.  Maybe something inside them has died.  Maybe they’re breaking your heart. There are so many ways and reasons we mourn. In a nutshell, mourning is grieving the loss of something. In my case, today,  I am grieving the loss of trust. I feel that something I cherish has been taken away, and I am grieving that loss. It is important for me to feel I can trust you. That’s my heart. Trust taken causes me to not want to be in relationship anymore. It is almost like a death. 

The Beatitudes are 8 blessings from God that Jesus taught to show us what the values and ethics of the Kingdom of Heaven requires. Our blessings come from living into these values. This blessing/beatitude about mourning, from God, taught by Christ, recorded by Matthew instructs: We must be willing to give when others take, to love when others hate, to help when others abuse. By setting aside your own rights in order to serve others, you will one day receive everything God has in store for you. 

This promise of comfort is something that will come in God’s time. Maybe not today and probably not from the one that took, but clearly God will make good on this pledge. Comfort is there for those that receive it. This blessing doesn't mean that I am being asked to ignore what has happen and allow myself to be hurt repeatedly in the same instance, but that I am to not let it affect my treatment of others to be tainted by the grief over one.

I will choose to forgive. I will try daily to forget, God will help. I will receive holy/divine comfort. Until that day, a Lola hug will do just fine. Maybe that is the comfort he sent.

Today:

• Show love
• Drink a soda
• Hug your puppy or kitty or Pygmy goat
• Ask God to give you comfort